Monday, May 31, 2010
The gay agenda...
Agenda: a list or outline of things to be considered or done
The gay agenda (according to right-wingers)
Put down meth pipe, get twenty minutes sleep, have gay sex, take the lord's name in vain.
Wake up, wipe semen off of hand cuffs, have gay sex.
Contact the gay mafia, ask how the youngster corruption is doing. Desecrate a picture of Jesus or Newt Gingrich. Have gay sex.
Hour long devil worship session. Remember to sacrifice 2 republican children today!
Breakfast, gay sex.
Prepare outer shell of respectability. Fool people into thinking I'm a good person. Have gay sex.
Jump in prius, drive to work. Run over kittens and defecate on a church on way to work.
Pretend to be computer programmer, actually insert pro-gay subliminal messages into unsuspecting professional software. Have gay sex in men's room with compliant homosexual.
Lunch, work on gay making ray (Should I call it HomoLaser?). Convert co-worker to the dark side of life. Molest something (horse today, I think).
Pretend to be computer programmer again. This time insert pictures of supple, beautiful penises into professional software. Tempt republicans into considering sweet, sweet male love.
Contact PFLAG. Ask how the promotion of special rights for gays is going. Make sure the horse-marrying legislation is on the way. Kill a nun. Have gay sex.
Dinner at George Soros's house. Kieth Olberman and Barack Obama strip for entertainment.
CLUBBING!!! Gay sex.
Start fourteen man, drug fueled orgy. Overthrow traditional marriage. Eat a baby.
The gay agenda (according to an actual gay person)
Run (five miles today!)
Head to work. Drop off books at library.
Work on project
Lunch, call mom.
Dinner at Tom and Denise's
Drinks with Significant other at local pub
Occam's razor: that the simplest solution is usually the correct one.
Song of teh post: Gay Bar, by Electric Six
Weirded out conservative of teh post: Basically any anti-gay politician caught soliciting sex from men.